did you know it would destroy me when you did it the first time? is that why you continued?
it’s been almost three years and i still wonder what she had that made you want her more than me.
11/30/2021
i don’t love you in a relationship way. i don’t know how i love you. but i do.
16 jul 2018
depression is cancer of the soul.
but there’s no chemotherapy for me.
you won’t notice the signs of my depression until after i’m dead.
they only care if you’re dead or pretty.
i don’t want you to love me because love makes everything harder. love makes the world go round, but i want my world to stop spinning.
15:365
i can’t believe i was stupid enough to chase you. and say i love you. and act like you were my savior. i worshipped everything about you. and for what? i have no fucking idea. i want to be anything but like you.
14:365
the hardest part about healing is the moments you’re not sure you want to.
13:365
i seek relationships that aren’t going to last so i can tell myself that i am the reason they failed. i blame myself for trusting someone who never loved me. i blame myself for thinking someone could love me when in the end they always leave.
12:365
you light this fire in my stomach everytime i’m near you. and i don’t know what it means or how to stop it. my heart skips when i see a text from you and my mind races when you don’t text back. i’m overly attached and i can’t tell if it’s good or bad.
11:365